The War of Desires and The Test of Wills

When two people or groups desire something that is diametrically opposed, this begins a war of desires between the two individuals or groups.   When desires are in conflict, what we witness is a test of will.  The test of will tests the desire within us to accomplish our objectives.  The being with the stronger desire will actually win this contest over time, but only through incredible sacrifice of will, energy, and power in order to achieve the objective that they have set their heart upon.

You can always tell who is going to win a contest.  The stronger party is the one that has the greater passion in its cause.   Thus the strength of desire is the ultimate test of will.  Power derives from the expansion of thought that is driven forward by great desire.  A great mind can be weaker than a greater desire to achieve.  Genius, even if gifted by birth, can be surpassed by someone with stronger desire and ambition to advance.

The root of desire in consciousness is at the core of what we call Love.  Love, driving desire forward into power through mind creates force to overcome obstacles physical, mental, psychological, and spiritual.  This power cannot be stopped.  This power cannot be overcome.  It waits and presses forward patiently towards fulfillment.

In a conflict of desire and will, established interests oppose the young and new players who fervently and passionately desire a better life for themselves.  Who is stronger?  Who will win the challenge?  It is obvious that the future belongs to the young and the children.  They have yet to gain power, and as such, ultimately must have a greater taste for it than those who are already vested in power.  In addition, the old are going to pass away before the young, so if generational conflict exists, the young are always favored.  Though these tests have been cruel and destructive in the past, the next round is likely to prove that strength alone will not prevail as the establishment will discover.  The desires of world of humans cannot be denied.  We will live.  We will be free.  No one can stop us.  We are the ones who will choose.

If Love is the root of your desire, then you cannot be defeated.  You have already won.  It may take a trillion lifetimes, but you will get there.  The fact that you keep testing power makes all the difference.  Thus, we must fight on to achieve our right to be the ones.  There is no other way except to give up and let the other ego win because you are afraid to rise up and meet our destiny. 

Only the weak simply lie down and die when confronted.  The strong must rise up and meet the challenge.  No one will ever respect weakness.  It will always be stepped on and sidelined.  It is not your nature to be weak.  Weakness is not about compassion.  It is about a belief in weakness.  It is about fear of standing up.  It is about feeling inadequate for the task.  But, to give into the inadequacy because of shame or doubt is to give in to defeat before you are defeated (which in truth you cannot be except by your own choice).  Defeat can only exist in the mind of someone who believes in it.  Yet to win the war of desires and test of wills, you must march on.  If you are too weak to march in the procession of victory, you can still support them from a distance with your voice.  With this strength, the new leaders will march to victory against the establishment which is weaker than us. 

You can confront your weakness only within to know how it is you are taught weakness as you grew up by your environment and education.  When you know how you have been kept down by fear of greatness being defeated by a greater power, then you may claim your right to rise up against authority and confront it until you win.  What authority does is not relevant to this state of freedom that comes from the courage to believe that you are the one that will change things.  This idea is what authority does not wish you to have because with it you can overcome your own fear.  The establishment relies upon your own personal demons to keep you in your place.  That is the constant game they play to keep you down and in the dark.  They would prefer that you do not discover your desire to rise up and become powerful and they would prefer that you subsume your will to theirs.  This is how the game of power is played.  If you understand the game, then you realize that most of what you are taught is a subtle manipulation to keep you weak so that someone else can exploit you for their own agenda and designs.  Those who do not know the game are easily defeated.

As an individual, you are weak, unless you are strong enough to speak out against the treatment you may be receiving.  More importantly, you must confront injustices.  You have a right to be.  You have a right to have.  This is implied by what you believe about what you own and have right to claim.  In fairness, in a collective that agrees to new rules of wealth allocation, you have a much better chance of succeeding than challenging the full range of the power of the current collective by yourself, no matter how powerful you may be.  Alliances offer the best possibility for achieving short and long term goals.  This is one reason that the establishment destroys alliances quickly.  Individuals are always a threat to the establishment's power, but groups represent a much larger threat as they could mushroom into a movement that could overcome the advantage the establishment has.  Once again, desire determines the victor ultimately.  Will overcomes will.  You must believe you can win before you do.  You must also know how to win before you can.

As a final note, there will always be an establishment of some sort.  There will always be upstarts and rebels of some sort.  These patterns are the same everywhere at all stages of consciousness.  The young will always seek to overthrow the ways and plans of the old when it is their turn to make choices.  This will continue until there is an agreement to work collectively towards a plan that is fair and just for all.  Even then, the conflict between egos is eternal.  We all have a right to stand up and claim our place.  We all have a right to prove ourselves to others.  We all have a right to be great.  Power flows to those that take a stand.  That is the way it has been.  That is the way it always will be.  And so it is.

Representations of Failure and Perfection

The word "failure" in modern language is defined to mean a permanent state of disappointment with the past and what was and was not accomplished according to a timetable created by someone's uninitiated ego.  By uninitiated I mean believing in "death" so that there is assumed to be no time to accomplish objectives within the context of an individual lifetime as each person is assumed to have one and is assumed to be under the demands of the accomplishment of success whereby the person must achieve "perfect results".  These "perfect results" are designed similarly from the position of authority assumed by someone else who exists in a hierarchy looking down on them, presumably, to give them a measure and standard upon which they must perform.  While practically, this measure is necessary and proper, the ideology of "failure" pressures people into acts of desperation because of a lack of long term critical thinking with regards to the true nature of existence and the true measure of success.

The word "failure" may simple be described internally as the experience of disappointment.  Disappointment is necessary in order for false beliefs of perfection to be rejected and replaced with a perfection that is based upon higher values.  These higher values of perfection are the ones that are created when we achieve a success, realize a higher ambition, and disappoint a plan to create a better plan that is closer to the truth than the one before it.  While no plan is absolutely perfect, and no state of being can be considered truly perfect throughout all time and space, these definitions of perfection are necessary to experience a satisfaction with the results that were created to the best of your ability at the time you realized what it was you set out to achieve.

The state of constantly questioning our prior achievements as being unworthy of our nature is only correct if we assume that our nature is unchanging.  Yet, our nature as beings is in a constant state of evolution through which we grow, learn, and discard previous ideologies, beliefs, and behaviors that we recognize as being imperfect.  While, at the time when we were acting out these incorrect modes of existence through our unconscious state of belief, these elements of imperfect knowing served their own purposes.  Thus while we should question our experiences to learn, we should not bash ourselves to force ourselves to reject our learning experience because of a false ideology based upon an unreasonable timetable based on imperfect information.

When we learn something about ourselves that causes us to discard a preexisting destructive behavior or idea we prove that negative does not exist except in the moment of feeling it fully for the first and last time.  What we feel, in those moments of negativity, is the full realization of the error.  Those moments are necessary to change our outlook.  It is then possible to state that the negative never was, and was not, because it's product, a better outlook, was created.  Yet, at the same time, the state of experiencing the negative was necessary in order to see the better outlook.  Negativity is only the lesson backwards in consciousness.  Thus, it is only experienced "right side up" after we know what it truly was and how it was that we fixed something in the process.  This is what we call learning.

The entire edifice of negativity is build upon the grounds of knowledge.  Every single negative event in every single person's life is simply knowledge unexamined.  Within the dark is contained the answer for the existence of the dark, the history of why it is, the knowledge what it is, and the answer as to why it was experienced.  This redemptive quality is made possible by you, the observer, experiencer, and knower of your life.  You are the witness and you make the choices.

In this, perfection and imperfection are all about perspective.  Knowing that everything has a purpose and a reason allows us to look fearlessly into the heart of fear and know that what lies there is the answer to the deepest questions of our own lives.  We may look deeply into the heart of our own worst mistakes and find an answer to how it is we made them, why it is they happened, and how it is that we can change them.  Then, we may say, they never happened, as we became the difference to what was, is, and most importantly of all, what will be.

How we represent failure and perfection to ourselves is based, at first, on what we learn from our family and society.  These standards are created and projected through the collective on waves of thought.  As these waves spread through our own consciousness, we become aware of the fact that we do not necessary act in our best interest because we have not been taught to act in our own best interest.  While this may, at first, appear to serve the agenda of the few, it is in fact, not serving anyone's agenda ultimately.  That is because of the law of karma.  It is impossible to create a destructive system of oppression without becoming caught up in the karma of that system.  It is impossible to destroy the rights of a majority without losing your own rights.  Thus, it is illogical and irrational to practice oppression because it costs you, the oppressor, money and time in the long run.

Systems of failure and perfection based on false ideologies cost everyone something.  The price is paid daily.  Yet none of this could be avoided.  It can only be changed at the moment of inception, when a new ideology of success and perfect mindedness replaces the ideology of force and deception that the current system represents.  How can the old system be replaced?  It can only be replaced when people know it.  The system itself is, in fact, a body of knowledge.  It is like a book that you read.  We know much of the history of oppression.  The history of belief is also very well recorded.  The past life connections are not recorded, as they are below our current level of perception as a collective.  Yet each piece of knowledge that is revealed changes elements of the collective slowly.

Imagine being able to change something just by knowing it.  While this may seem complex and utterly ridiculous, knowing what something is changes the nature of the relationship between you and it.  Where before you may have experienced the illusion of dark specters ruining your day, knowing the nature of the experience you have had and are having changing the way in which the experience operates instantly.  The power of knowledge is truly beyond words.

So while we are unaware of how we represent failure and perfection to ourselves up until the moment we choose to examine the origin of those beliefs in consciousness (in this life or beyond), then we are prisoners to our unconscious representations.  As long as we do not examine them, they are the programs which run our lives, for better or worse, until we understand their origins, their nature, and why it is we cling to them so stubbornly.  Don't like the results?  Change the program.  Make a new choice once you understand what choices you have been programmed to take automatically by your "education".  It is that simple.

At the end of the day, we all must face our own demons.  They are all made of knowledge.  Every last one.  It is that knowledge that frightens us.  It is our ability to know that makes us cringe.  We have all been trained to pretend that we don't know.  But the fact is, deep down, you know what it is that you are experiencing.  You know why you are experiencing it.  You know how you created it.  The answers are everywhere, because the signs are everywhere.  All you have to do is listen to your heart and read the signs.

The Ego Speaks

The "new age movement" anti-ego ego is a bore.  A bore beyond bores.  How could anyone follow the complete lack of imagination that comes out of that end of the collective shame.  The ego could be fantastic.  The ego could be fabulous.  No one ever picks the "anti-ego".  Those that do end up destroying themselves with a sad look on their face because they couldn't see past their loneliness.  Now, while that's sad and all, people who love life would never simple reject everything it has to offer.  What kind of idiot does that?

Yes, there is the moment of bitter realization that the world just is a small place and the most money you could possibly make here is hideously limited by the lack of productive output.  But, what about your imagination?  Why not simply make a better story and be happy with that?  Not enough ego?  Did you decide it was all not worth it because you needed to spend some time feeling poor for yourself?  Poor you.  When you find out what you're sad about, come by the party.

There is alot of bad stuff going on around the world.  How much of it has to do with ego?  All of it.  How much of it has to do with anti-ego?  All of it.  What?!  Huh?  Confused?  I bet.

People who reject the world could be said to be anti-ego.  People who wish to exploit the world for their own purposes could be said to be ego but anti-world.  People who wish to care for the world could be said to be of higher ego and pro-world.  A higher ego is a bigger ego is a better ego. 

The solution to the world's problems has never been to reject everything that is everything and declare that everything is nothing.  That is what is referred to as nihilism which is loosely translated as a belief or worship of nothing.  While this is a fabulously boring philosophy to force on anyone, there are many who swear that the best way to save the world is for humanity to off itself quickly and let the animals take the place over again.  As much as love animals, I must utterly reject that mood as utterly and totally useless.

What could be more beautiful than an ego that spans the stars dreaming in an infinite sea of dreams; a vast dream of its own service to all the beings that are all of his or her's relations?  This is ego too.  Not the ego you were expecting, no doubt.  What could be more meaningful than the promise of eternal life for an ego so vast that it would touch the infinite with the right to create a sea of life as vast as an eternal imagination could create?  Could you conceive it?  Would you believe it?  Or is this just another trick to get you to turn to the dark side of ego?

Maybe I'm sugar coating the possibilities here.  What about all the pain?  The suffering?  What about the death?  The horror?  What about the dark?  Don't I realize that by creating countless bodies for countless beings I am causing them endless pain to be reincarnated over and over to experience the nightmare of breathing, eating, walking, talking, doing, and discovering themselves?  Am I just the greatest fat controller to ever walk the world, or the many planes of the afterworld to dare to suggest that maybe, just maybe, that the whole thing might be worth it at the end when every one of those beings gets a chance to experience the joys of creating a life and a soul themselves?  Is it worth it?  You tell me.

Haven't quite gotten what you were promised?  Did you even bother to ask?  Did you even bother to look past your resentment long enough to see the possibility of the eternal life that beats in your soul?  To know the truth of who you are?  Did you look?  Did you see?  Are you still believing in the illusion that things aren't the way they need to be?  The ego is of service.  Know your dark rites to see why it is you experience them.  Know your sacrifices and why you made them.  Arm yourself with the truth of what you are.  A human being is greater than any dream of God yet written.  The possibilities await.  The eternal ego lifting the eternal spirit forever into the infinite soul of eternal birthing and re-birthing creation through mind and body.

Now let's talk details.


Imagine for a moment the thought that nothing ever happened that was negative.  Beneath all the misguided attempts to get somewhere else lies the truth at the heart of emptiness that proves, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that nothing simply doesn't exist.  It's an odd place to be, where all the bad feelings in the world add up to so many illusions that don't matter or add up to a hill of beans, or one bean, or even an atom's worth of bean.  But how can anyone see past the wall of fear, doubt, hate, rage, or other hysterical outpouring coming at us from somewhere?  Where does all that nasty stuff come from anyway?

Many are inclined to blame the neighborhood fanatic, unwelcome foreigner, or odd individual.  Others would prefer to think that some establishment is responsible through an odd frequency of conspiracy and intention to harm.  But then, how, rationally, can any of this be anything other than an illusion of the most insidious kind that we are forced to face it with two eyes open?

The odd truth about non is that it isn't.  It never happened.  You were never there.  It's a weird place to be that some would simply label denial or delusional.  I mean, surely, I would not deny the victim the right to stand against the victimizer and demand justice?  But reality isn't based on what was, or even what is, if what it stands for is nothing but a callous indifference to the right to know.

So then the wheel (of karma) turns.  The illusion burns.  And the right to know goes unexplored behind a facade to escape the inescapable truth.  There is no prison, no guard.  There is no oppressor.  There is no evil doer hiding behind an invisible cloak waiting to pounce when we least suspect.  Our suspicions turn out to be baseless echoes of long gone ghosts.  The dreams of our ancestors relived through the collective dream.  How then are dreams real?  Even less, dark dreams.  The only thing that matters about dreams is what you get out of them.  You can't take the darkness outside of the dream, only outside of the dreamer.  When the dream is gone, only the dreamer remains.  Do bad dreams matter after you wake up?

That makes me think that waking up is easy to do.  Hard must just not be.  It isn't.  You weren't there.  It never happened.  That sort of attitude could piss alot of people off, but if anger isn't real, then what good would it do them to pretend?  Is there really even a "them"?  Or is just another act played by a dreaming actor or actress designed to delay the inevitable realization that their lives are based on an illusion.  Darkness to darkness, light to light. 

The dream of endings is an interesting one.  Death, the perennial favorite of every unreal "realist" points a finger in the face of no one.  Accusing the awakened, the shadow, dripping with its own delusional hostility believing that it somehow speaks makes its words meaningless.  This is called "death consciousness", but it never happened.  And you weren't there to know.  So if darkness is just another sign, then some people are zombies.  And if we are actually surrounded by zombies, sleepwalking who eat the dead, metaphorically and allegorically of course, then why is it that we worry at all about how those zombies are going to react to a bit a light in their lives?  Maybe we've been sleepwalking too long ourselves.  But then we were never here.  And it never happened.

There is an old saying in science.  You can't prove a negative.  And yet, people base their whole lives around trying to prove negatives.  They work hard at proving how miserable they are.  They endlessly talk about how bad things happened.  They constantly judge with harshness themselves and others.  Are they trying to prove themselves unhappy?  Are they trying prove a non?  And who could possibly commit to non?  Nothing is as nothing.  It doesn't do.  It isn't.  So why try?  Trying is lying.

There is a saying I have heard recently.  Fake it till you make it.  I'm certain I wasn't there when I heard it.  I know I didn't just write it down for you to read it.  I know you didn't see it.  Because the more you think about it, the more you realize what I am saying about what we refer to as "bullshit".  I could categorize this "bullshit" thoroughly and explain it to you until your brain hurt.  But I will spare you just for right now by showing you that faking it isn't making it.  So why bother with faking it at all?  What are we faking?  Truth?  Love?  Knowledge?  Conscience?  Power?  Greatness?  Humility?  Pick one.  It's pathetic to believe that you can become anything by faking.  How do you fake originality?  You can't.  So faking isn't real.  It never happened.  And only zombies make up shit like that.  You put 2 and 2 together and you get it.  That's called success.  The rest is bird food and garden fertilizer.

The magic of non is that it isn't unless it has a witless witness.  The witness must be brainless to not see the logic.  How does one prove death?  How does one prove fear?  How does one prove hate?  Each of these myths is a self creating self sustaining system.  It doesn't exist because you can't prove it's there.  If you don't believe me, try to isolate a negative in your consciousness.  You can't.  That's because it disappears the minute you see it for what it is.  Bullshit.  Fertilizer for the soul. 

I hang out with a few people who believe that "what you focus on expands".  They say its bad to focus on the negative.  They don't watch news, and are usually what we refer to as "conspiracy theorists".  But the negative isn't real, so how can focusing on it hurt anyone?  If you call their ideology black, they get very annoyed and start spewing their illusions all over the place, generally in your direction.  But if it is all an act, then why get caught up in the drama?  And if the drama is just an act, then why bother with the show.  At the end of the show, it's non or anon. 

I had a bad dream once.  I don't remember what it was about.  I think I learned something.  I let the dream go.  I woke up happy.  That is what mattered.  I thanked the dream.  I remembered myself.

Wakey wakey.  Anon to non.